SEVEN WAYS TO HANDLE INFATUATION


So, what do you do when you discover that you are strongly attracted to a member of the opposite sex? Here are seven ways a girl can handle infatuation for best results.

  1. DON’T BE SCARED: This kind of feeling is called infatuation, realise it is part of your growing up process. The normal teenager will experience it at one time or the other. Thus, it is not abnormal to be infatuated, but it is dangerous to dwell on infatuation and allow it to lead you to do ridiculous things. Wrong response to infatuation can ruin your entire life.
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  3. CONTROL YOUR THOUGHTS: One mistake several girls make is to keep feeding their minds with thoughts about the guy they are infatuated with. This should not be. I know it is exciting to keep thinking about him, but these thoughts will weaken your sense of reasoning, which will make you do things you will regret later. You have the ability to control your thoughts; so control them by forcing yourself to think about more meaningful things of life. Find something else that you love to do and do it. As you do things that you love, your mind will be less pre-occupied about the guy and gradually the feelings would wane off.
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  5. CONTROL YOUR ACTIONS: This means that you should not allow your feelings to make you do silly things in order to make the guy notice you. Don’t hang around him; I advise you to reduce avoidable contact with the guy, let your contacts be the ones that are unavoidable. For example, if you are in the same school, you may meet on the assembly, along the corridor or in other places as you go about your normal day. It is important that you avoid giving him personal attention and going out of your way to look for him. Avoid calling him on phone, visiting his Facebook page, or visiting him at home. This is to help you gain control over your own emotions. If you happen to meet him, relate politely and be as brief as possible.
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  7. REASON WITH YOURSELF: Remind yourself that infatuation is not real love. Going into a relationship with the guy is like fanning emotions into flame when there is no fire extinguisher around. It has the capacity to consume you. That is why the Bible says that you must not stir up love until the appointed time (Song of Solomon 2:7). Always remind yourself that you will keep falling in and out of love as you move on in life. Some women who are mothers now, but who did not control these feelings in their earlier years, have bitter tales of woe. You must have seen some mothers who have had children for different fathers. For many, they did not plan such to happen. But somewhere along the line, they mistook infatuation for real love and they made irreversible mistakes. I am sure you don’t desire such to happen to you. If you don’t know how to handle infatuation as a young girl now, it may lead to the dilemma that these women found themselves in.
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  9. SEEK COUNSEL: If after you have taken the above steps, you still find that your passion is greatly stirred up when you meet the boy, it is good to discuss with a godly woman that you can trust. If you cannot find any such woman around you, call the phones numbers or send messages to contacts provided within the counselling tab. Sharing your struggles with the right person will reduce the pressure on your mind and help you to think more clearly.
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  11. MAKE UP YOUR MIND: Make up your mind firmly that you are not going into any relationship with a guy until you are of marriageable age. So, if the boy approaches you to be his girlfriend, refuse firmly. Don’t play around him; don’t say ‘no’ with your mouth while your actions say ‘yes’. I know some girls who will say ‘no’ to a guy, but they keep collecting gifts from him. Let your refusal be firm and clear.
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  13. BE WISE: You are at a stage in your life when you are still learning about issues of life; you are still trying to understand yourself and still have a lot of things to pursue to be a well-grounded and stable lady in the future. Going into dating a guy at this time is a distraction for your life. Infatuation becomes an opportunity and a good tool to teach you self-control if you respond to the feeling as recommended above; it is not meant to pull you down.
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